Lipstick Chat | Real Talk

Ever felt like you were ALIVE but you weren't TRULY LIVING? Like you were going through life DAY TO DAY but on the INSIDE you WERE at a STANDSTILL? This life that we live can take us through so many obstacles, hurdles, amazing moments, happy moments and heartaches. Day to Day we take life by what it hands us and what we put out into the Universe.

Its how so many of us feel at times, but we are too afraid to speak out and tell someone. Why? Because one, everyone will not understand. Two, they won't care, and Three, they are going to judge you anyway. 

I'm going to be as transparent as it gets with you all. I'm removing my mask and being in honesty at this moment. The worst thing we can do is have a vision with no direction, a passion with a question of purpose. Taking away this is where I should be at this age, letting that go at this moment. There are many days where I breakdown, where I cry because I have Vision but fear, doubt, anxiety, other's opinions push me down where I question everything. 

I feel like I'm ALIVE but I'm not authentically LIVING. Especially in my career. I've transitioned to being a Medical Instructor, which I honestly can say is not fulfilling to me. I want to work on my passions, my love for beauty, skincare, fashion etc. full-time. I know that isn't how it work. We all START SOMEWHERE. Maybe I'm there because I chose it, and because it's teaching me a valuable lesson on patience, dealing with others, and being of front stage everyday. Maybe GOD is preparing me for a bigger audience that I will speak to in my future and he is saying SHOW ME that you can handle this first. 

Also, being a single parent throws me curve-balls each and everyday. It's amazing to watch my son grow, to see him become his own little self with so much personality is truly a blessing. But raising a son isn't easy. I just hope that I make him proud and teach him the right ways. 

Another thing is that when you are in a relationship. You two become one, or something like that. You change, He Change. It's all suppose to be for the better. It's so great when you can learn from someone else, you can have a partner that has your back no matter what, and someone where you both can genuinely love one another. But the road there isn't easy, because sometimes we can lose sight of who we are. 

One thing I search for everyday is True Bliss and Authentic Happiness and I will not stop until I reach it. I know that everyday will not be Sunshine and Rainbows, but when we learn to dance in the Storm we Get Through....