Mommy Mode: J.Cole on Tavis Smiley

I am the Mother of a 9 year old son. He is amazing, talented, and truly a gift in my life. His name is Jhalen (prounounced J-len). As a mother I always have lots of concerns such as am I raising him right, showing him how to be a gentleman and I am on the right path when it comes to his education.

As we all know, knowledge can never be taken away from you. That is a gift you will always have and it can take you places that you have never imagined.

My son loves to read, he loves school but he also is a typical child who gets frustrated with Math, who likes to sometimes talk and play when that is not the lesson at the moment. He attends a school known for excellence and they will do what it takes to make sure that your child excels and works very hard. One thing that is so different from when I attended school is the way that lessons are being taught, it is called common core. The way that my son learns to break down his math equations is totally different from back in my day. Now, imagine trying to be the wing and tutor at home when math isn't your best subject either.....

I'll wait...... LOL!

Also, as a teacher I have seen that students learn subjects in different ways. They may grasp it by visual learning, or maybe by being hands on. But, have you ever realized that sometimes when doing work, you may not be retaining the information but you have mastered how to pass the tests and lessons to get to the next level?

This is what J.Cole spoke of in his latest sit down interview with Tavis Smiley. He graduated Magna Cum Laude from St. Johns University, which is not always common for everyday rappers that we listen to on the radio. But, one thing is that J.Cole always knew he was going to go to college; in 1st grade he would always ask his teacher what his grades were, when they were only stamping Satisfactory and so forth on papers.

One thing, that stuck out to me is that he said he mastered how to take tests, you know cramming the night before and then going into class and blowing it out of the water. But, he felt as if he did not retain a lot of information as a student.

click to SEE THE INTERVIEW HERE...

It was an AHA moment for me. Why? Because I am so hard on my son when he does not do great on a test, and I am so hard on myself when it happens as well. I'm all discombobulated and upset, and asking myself where have I failed at because he didn't get the A+. We, as parents and just as individuals have to learn that ONE BAD or ONE GOOD TEST does not DEFINE how SMART we are, it does not make us DUMBFOUNDED, and it is just material that coincides with the lesson that is being taught. What it can do is help us learn more, or help us in areas where we may need to study.

LET ME KNOW YOUR FULL THOUGHTS about this perception and his interview.

Lipstick Chat | Real Talk

Ever felt like you were ALIVE but you weren't TRULY LIVING? Like you were going through life DAY TO DAY but on the INSIDE you WERE at a STANDSTILL? This life that we live can take us through so many obstacles, hurdles, amazing moments, happy moments and heartaches. Day to Day we take life by what it hands us and what we put out into the Universe.

Its how so many of us feel at times, but we are too afraid to speak out and tell someone. Why? Because one, everyone will not understand. Two, they won't care, and Three, they are going to judge you anyway. 

I'm going to be as transparent as it gets with you all. I'm removing my mask and being in honesty at this moment. The worst thing we can do is have a vision with no direction, a passion with a question of purpose. Taking away this is where I should be at this age, letting that go at this moment. There are many days where I breakdown, where I cry because I have Vision but fear, doubt, anxiety, other's opinions push me down where I question everything. 

I feel like I'm ALIVE but I'm not authentically LIVING. Especially in my career. I've transitioned to being a Medical Instructor, which I honestly can say is not fulfilling to me. I want to work on my passions, my love for beauty, skincare, fashion etc. full-time. I know that isn't how it work. We all START SOMEWHERE. Maybe I'm there because I chose it, and because it's teaching me a valuable lesson on patience, dealing with others, and being of front stage everyday. Maybe GOD is preparing me for a bigger audience that I will speak to in my future and he is saying SHOW ME that you can handle this first. 

Also, being a single parent throws me curve-balls each and everyday. It's amazing to watch my son grow, to see him become his own little self with so much personality is truly a blessing. But raising a son isn't easy. I just hope that I make him proud and teach him the right ways. 

Another thing is that when you are in a relationship. You two become one, or something like that. You change, He Change. It's all suppose to be for the better. It's so great when you can learn from someone else, you can have a partner that has your back no matter what, and someone where you both can genuinely love one another. But the road there isn't easy, because sometimes we can lose sight of who we are. 

One thing I search for everyday is True Bliss and Authentic Happiness and I will not stop until I reach it. I know that everyday will not be Sunshine and Rainbows, but when we learn to dance in the Storm we Get Through....

Real Talk: Parenting

Parenting/ Real Talk/ Inspiration

Let's have a little real talk conversation today :) This site isn't for the woman who lives a fairy tale life, I myself don't have that, not the American dream with the white picket fence and two dogs. I live a realistic life with ups and downs, a road that I want to often travel straight but it sometimes winds me up and causes a detour as well. All of it is worth it, it makes me who I am and strengthens me each new day.

So let's talk Parenting, which is a wonderful blessing to bring in a bundle of joy into the world and enter into Parenthood.

We have the two parent homes, the single parent homes, and also the children whom may be raised by someone else other than their parents. Parenting is such a joy, it is amazing to watch our child/ren take their first walk, say their first words, see what they like and don't like, their unique personalities and developing talents. I think it is so vital that both parents be involved in a child's life whether together or not. I believe that a mother is the nurturer, she kisses the boo-boo's. A father is the strength whom teaches the child how to handle the tough situations. Both parents have the birds and bees talk with either their daughter or son. A father teaches his daughters how a woman should be treated, he is the example of the man she want to have in her life. A mother teaches grace, class, the level of respect that should be given and so on.

It is hard when you are a full time parent, and the other is just PRN. This isn't a part time thing, it takes so much responsibility and patience. We are a jack/ jill of all trades. We become a teacher, a superhero, a doctor, a chef, a custodian. We are so much in our kids lives. They watch our every move and copy what we do. We have to lead the way and build the road to their future lives. Train a Child in the way that he or she go and as they are older they will never depart from it. I teach my son that he can be whatever he wants to be in life, I breathe life in his direction each and every day, I remind him that I love him and I am always there no matter what. It isn't easy at times, I become frustrated and impatient, but I am thankful for his unconditional life, his smile when we are together, and so much more.

We never know the love of a parent till we become parents ourselves.

Henry Ward Beecher

Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.

Charles R. Swindoll

Children are educated by what the grown-up is and not by his talk.

Carl Jung

Share your parenting moments with us, we would love to hear them.

Lipstick & Love, XOXO

Images via Google, Quotes via BrainyQuote